Saturday, November 22, 2008


I never thought I'd live to see the day. ;) I'm hoping for lots-o-fun news in entertainment soon, but for now, the ever-wonderful Substantia of Adipositivity has created a 2009 wall calendar of the hottest chicks I've ever seen. Some of my FAVORITE pictures of the project are in there, and as a little cherry on top for me, I'm Miss December!

So go out to CafePress and get all your adorable, beautiful, adipose, body-lovin' selves a calendar that actually reinforces our entire FA lifestyle. :)

U buy dems heer peez


Tuesday, November 4, 2008


Less than an hour ago, we were told that Barack Obama was officially the newest president of the US.

I did not enjoy Obama through the primaries...I thought he was pompous and short and unkind. I felt that Hillary played the primaries VERY well and I wanted her to win by leaps and bounds over him.

When he won, I was definitely not pleased, and I was certainly on the fence right on through the conventions. Like most of us, once McCain chose Palin, that was really the beginning of my big doubt for McCain. As Obama moved forward with the campaign, I saw him making smart, wise choices; I heard him making deep and well-crafted plans for our nation. I was growing a respect for a man who was becoming increasingly likeable, and definitely more viable in my eyes (and sadly for McCain, his ship has been sinking for months...).

When Obama was named 44th President tonight, I finally got what I had so badly desired 4 years ago when I PRAYED for a Kerry victory. I feel proud, glowing, happy and--most of all--HOPEFUL.

I certainly pray that Obama will turn us around and take us into the dreams he's introduced us to. But for now, I am reveling in my Hope. :)

All you Chicago lovelies, I hope you are proud of your landsman!


Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Booty-Grindin' Music Videos: An Improvement!

Hello FOS! I'm sorry I've been remiss. I haven't had a whole lot to write about lately. Most of what's been on my mind is undoubtedly been on everyone's mind--the election, and preparing for (what I have a hunch will be) a significant depression. The good news is that for us starving actors, our biz is booming when the rest of society's hurting. I'm not worried too much about getting work...just how I'll get by *until* I get work.

That said! I just booked a fun gig last week; my first music video. It was a pretty fun job! Considering that friends of mine have had horror stories from working on rappers' videos like 50Cent and Chingy, I was relieved to be working with the Jason Mraz of the UK, Julian Velard.

What was SUPERCOOL about this was that the premise of the video was that these women couldn't help stopping to kiss him on the street. And I as one of those women, a 'Kisser.' I was so...DELIGHTED to see that ALL the actresses were either NOT 'TV-thin' or NOT 'media-Hot.' And, of course, everyone there was lovely and beautiful (in actual real world life), and there were even a big handful of fat and chubby gals! I thought it was really, really excellent that this guy (or even his manager, I really don't care who) was choosing actual normal-looking women to court him in his video.

And his music's pretty swell, too! ;)


Sunday, September 7, 2008

Jenny, Don't Change that Number!

My darling and future co-queen Jennifer Jonassen has not one, but *2* new fabulous articles in Plus Model Magazine.

The FOS had been buzzing a while about Carson Kressley's new Lifetime series, "How To Look Good Naked," and there was some super-positivity and some meh-ness across the board. I myself waffle, and am simultaneously "YAY body-love!" and "No! Makeover!". However, in this latest issue, Queen Jen interviews him, and I think it's really lovely that, no matter how you feel about him, he's true to the idea of body love. Read that magnificence HERE.

ALSO, for those of us who are play-happy, you may be familiar with Niel LaBute's play a few years ago, "Fat Pig." GREAT, GREAT story, and one of the only ones that creates a likeable, smart, funny and fat romantic lead character. The problem is that the man who falls in love with her has also fallen prey to his asshole friends. It's so intimate, and such a beautiful love story--while my broke ass couldn't see it when it was in NY, perhaps you Californians could be lucky enough to catch this dish in San Diego.

Weekend goodies!


Saturday, September 6, 2008

Weighty Issues in Entertainment

The universe is desperately trying to balance out the RIDONK sexist barrage of news re: Sarah Palin (in every single, anti-her, etc.), which has made me vomitous all week. I have way too much vaytik over what will be going down over the next 2 months!

Anyway! The balance is this: As per my last post, questions of weight and its role in casting are beginning to surface in the acting world. This doesn't seem to be addressed by fatties, but by middlies (in the acting world, anyway)--size 6 and 8. Bonnie Gillespie gave a GREAT feedback last week, and this week, Backstage's columnist Jackie Apodaca writes more about it: Matters of Size.

It's not shielding--it's blunt and direct, and gives a pretty sad (but truthful) look at the standards. And, while it's true that there's *not* many roles for fat chicks, when they're around, I'm a true contender. But for all the skinny roles? I'm sorry, but 6 is apparently not skinny enough.

In other good news? I'm watching "House" for the first time in my life, and it just happens to be the Season 1 episode, "Heavy," which is ALL about mis-diagnosing fat people because, um, well, they're fat. It's not perfect, but it DOES have the message that we send of: HEALTH PROBLEMS ARE NOT EQUAL TO FAT PROBLEMS! *and* it has some nice FA-stuffs thrown in by a fat patient, who is quite comfortable with her body, thankyouverymuch. And she shuts House up when he tries to make fat jokes! p0wnd.

Little vittles for y'all. :)


Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Teh Fattiez: +1

Good news!

One of my FAVORITE career bloggers, the casting director Bonnie Gillespie, writes a column called "The Actor's Voice." She posts every Monday and it's a blog that I read religiously.

She has touched on body image only a few times, and is very honest and open about there being roles for EVERY type--and there are some major types who can be/are frequently cast as being fat. Her advice (which is 100% on the money) is to KNOW your type and GO for it 3000%!

This said...she will still get e-mails, usually from "green" actors (read: inexperienced) who ask her, "Should I lose weight to do movies and TV? Don't I have to be skinny to be on TV?"

This is the first column I've read which expressly addresses just that, and she does it beautifully--putting in a lot of info that's sympatico with body image, fat acceptance and HAES. I am so happy! Read her glory HERE.

I e-mailed her my congratulations:

"Dear Bonnie,

THANK YOU for your fantastic column on size and body image in the entertainment industry. As a fat actress, I know how it feels when people look at me dubiously when I say I'm an actor--what, do they think everyone is supposed to be a starlet? I also know how scary and internalized it is for people of size--and it's so important for people to understand that acting is not equivalent to thinness. Thank you for your insight--I am sure you will positively affect MANY of your readers!

Juicy Acting!"

She replied:

"Thanks, Jen. :) It was a fun column for me. I'm glad you enjoyed ittoo. Being comfortable in your skin is really all that matters, whenit comes down to it, right? :)
Keep rockin'!"

Nice to have another ace up our sleeve, eh? ;-)


'Real' Women?

Reebok is casting.....



Size 4/6, not "too skinny," "real girls" requested. Gotcha.

A.) Implying that ANY woman--be she size 0 or size 30--might not be 'real.'
B.) Implying that there is a 'too skinny'--which is, quite frankly, offensive to our thinner sisters.
C.) Implying that real women are only valid as a 4 or 6.

Hmm. Well, this is why the entertainment industry is not subject to the rules, regulations and employment laws of the rest of the world. it "progress" that they're asking for someone as a size 6 and not a size 2? (Probably not. But just a thought.)


Sunday, August 24, 2008

Perfect Timing

(This was written on Wednesday....oops!)

Ohmylord, after the INCREDIBLE sharing thread at SP (have you read it?!), the events of today were staggering.

My bestest friend ever and I took today to go to Coney Island. She's fat; on the slim side of fat, but she's probably a 14? I can't really tell. ANYWAY. She's still a chubby love. It was her first time and she was SO excited. She is not as top-heavy as I am, but she's got quite a rack nonetheless; I was wearing a one-piece bathing suit and she was wearing a tankini.

After our time on the beach and swimming, when we walked around, I put a shirt over my bathing suit and she just wore the tankini--because it is her every freaking right to do so. You wouldn't have thought that, though, hearing the men around us. We (she?) was catcalled at A MINIMUM OF 10 TIMES in just an hour or two. This was the most catcalling that either she or I had *ever* experienced, and thankfully none of it was "negative." She's VERY insecure about her body (which, yes, I'm working on) and I think she would have gone into a major tailspin.

We were confronted by SO many men, the majority of which were (I think) pinpointing her. Some undoubtedly thought they were being nice.
Some were just sleazy... "HEY BABY! YOU REAL CUTE!"
.....some were relatively tame... "HELLO GORGEOUS! I LOVE YOU!"
...and some were fucking TERRIBLE--men blatantly interrupting the fact that we were conversing, saying, "HEY! HEY! COME BACK HERE! I'M TALKING TO YOU!"

I can't even tell you the kind of shit going through my mind. The problem is, while I've gotten tougher over the years, my BFF has gotten softer. She is wont to respond to catcalling with a smile or a "thank you," because of course it's a 'compliment' and she appreciates it. So unlike me, who walks stoically through the streets and ignores everyone, she will put out the good vibes...which can invite unwanted advances.

Unfortunately, her smiles and 'thank you's culminated in some creepy, leering drunk man following us (I noticed he started after observing that she responded positively to some creep). I am WAY not saying this is her fault! I'm just saying that that's probably what legitimized it in the man's mind. Any way, he started following us while leering. I noticed this and grabbed her and we hurried ahead. HE FOLLOWED MORE QUICKLY. We had to nearly gallop towards the boardwalk (we were, at the time, in a pretty deserted thoroughfare--thanks, C.I., for the abandoned construction sites) to get ahead of him and shoot into a dark bar.

I stuck my head out to see if he'd seen us, and I saw him waiting for us and looking around RIGHT outside the bar. Thankfully, the bartender saw that we were anxious and offered us a way out through the back. We escaped the guy.

I kinda took this in stride. As per my story in that above post, I've had my share of creepy followers and threatening situations. My hyper-sensitivity to these sorts of encounters helped, too, since I was really on-guard and riled up from everyone's horror stories. However, it REALLY shook up my BFF. She's been so nice to everyone, and thankfully never experienced anything like this until now. She was very upset, and was definitely blaming herself. I said, "NO! This is NOT your fault, and it never will be! These people are not INVITED to comment on you or invade your space--you can wear whatever you want, and you can still be a nice person. You are NOT the guilty one here." I think I made an impression on her, but it was still so upsetting to see her taking the 'guilty victim' ideology, here.

I suppose the timing couldn't have been better, though--I was able to pull stories from all the brave souls in the FOS, and give her a sense of what catcalling REALLY is. It is not a compliment--and I feel badly for the men who honestly mean it to be nice, and not predatory. It is unsolicited behavior that comments on our bodies being public property. I hope this scary situation--and the stories of all of you--keeps her on her guard for the future.


Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Just when you think it's hit the top...

...what with all this horrendous Olympics bullshit, the comparison between the S.I. covers (which was nauseating), and just TV/film/magazines in general...they STILL manage to come up with this crapola:

Tuesday, Aug. 19, 2008, 3:37 PM Pacific

Casting Director: DJ FeldmanInterview Dates: Dallas (9/2 - 9/8), NY and LA ongoing Shoot/Start Date: TBD Pay Rate: There is pay -- rate TBD Location: Los Angeles


NOTE: ALSO INCLUDE PERFORMANCE VIDEOS OR ACTOR SLATES IF AVAILABLE. DO NOT SEND DEMO TAPES.The producers of 30 Days and Flip That House, along with a Major Network, are searching the country for HOLLYWOOD'S NEXT IT GIRL in Reality Television.

[ "IT GIRLS" ]Seeking: Beautiful, outgoing, social savvy women between 21-32 years old who are exceptionally attractive and have BIG personalities. - Are you a very attractive and ultra confident woman? - Have you always gotten what you want because of your great looks? - Do you always get your way? - Do you need to be the center of attention? - Are you proud of being a tough Bitch? If you are any or ALL of the above, then we want to meet you!This is the opportunity of a lifetime to become HOLLYWOOD’S NEXT IT GIRL. 8 contestants will showcase their looks and personalities to compete for a HUGE cash prize. To be considered, submit the following information - Name - Age - Contact Number(s) - Recent Photos (One can be Headshot and Non Headshot) - Why you think you have what it takes to be Hollywood’s Next It Girl.


You know what does make me happy, though? My agent that I freelance with just got me a job NOT based on my body. It's the first time they've done that. The auditions and jobs they've gotten me for in the past are all really good, well-paying projects--but they've *always* been about my size. This is the FIRST role I've been submitted for based on my skills, mainly comedic. :) The downside? (Oh, and there is one...)

There is a fat character, a black girl, named Mercedes. Of the couple of lines that I saw she had, one of them involved a skinny, nerdy Indian boy bringing her "stacks of treats and sodas." Her line to him?

"Next time, don't even bother asking--I like EVERYTHING supersized!"

Now, it does intimate that she's got a thing for the Indian kid, so heh-heh-lemme-see-your-dingdong, but.....c'mon, people. Is it really down to jokes this stupid?

Step by step...right?


Friday, August 8, 2008



I opened my beloved to watch some Buffy. I almost always watch on their link,, because it has both halves of the episodes.

However, when I saw this....ohmyLORD. I had to click so I could take screen shots to show what horrendous monstrosity it develops into.

Is there any way to complain about this?! When I 'won' the game, it took me to one of those insipid free ipod sites.



ABC a Success!

Hi folks! I'm sorry I popped out of the 'sphere for a bit; my internet connections have been few and far-between (and CRAZY maddening).

So, last week I filmed that fantastic TV segment that I'd previously mentioned, and--as far as I know--it's airing somewhere around November/December. The production crew was fantastic, as were the women who played the thin bride and the mother.

So, basically, we did somewhere between 10-15 takes over a period of 2 days, 'takes' (in this case) equaling each time the mother and I went out into this BEAUTIFUL bridal salon to do our schpiel in front of many other to-be brides.

First of all, I was given THE most LOVELY dress:

(Which, if I may say so, looks WAY better on a fat chick than the skinny version!)

We filmed at the most incredibly upscale and famous boutique in the world--Kleinfeld, which is also where "Say Yes to the Dress!" is filmed. What would happen is that the mother and I would come out of the dressing area and proceed to the salon, at which time she would start ripping me to shreds for a.) how bad the dress looks on me and b.) it was all because I'm fat.

The idea is to see how other people respond. This is *the* place to be for Manhattanite brides (and one of the most fat-phobic cities in the world?), so the crowd would be massive and interesting.

Basically, all in all, responses were great. We had to work it so that the mother would, at some point, leave--because it was much more likely that I'd be approached alone as the victim than if the aggressor were still there. Sometimes NO ONE intervened--but we were always, always watched, by future brides and their families. (And yeah, I did kinda feel bad that I was likely stressing a LOT of people out on the day that they were trying on dresses!)

For the most part, the people who would approach me when I was Poor Crying Fat Girl were super-sweet, telling me how beautiful I looked, and not to listen to her, and that the dress looked wonderful on me. However, I'm sure you could have predicted that--thanks to the fat bias--there would be a lot of backhanded compliments that weren't meant to be unkind. Like these:

"Oh, but your face is so pretty!"
"Your wedding's in June?! Your mother's crazy--you still have so much time to lose weight."
"You look gorgeous. That dress is so slimming and forgiving."

But, frustrating as those were, everyone meant quite well. I also had PLENTY of time to get in FA points...I don't know how many (if any) will make the final cut, but I would say stuff to my mom like, "Mom! This is just the way my body is! I've tried dieting so many times, it's never worked, and those 'lifestyle changes' are no different. I'm just FAT." I frequently also said that I liked the way I looked and that I felt really pretty, so yay for me. :)

What was a really, really nice experience was talking to my skinny counterpart--who, seriously, thought the world of me and couldn't have been sweeter. I think that everyone was really worried that they'd offend me, just because the nature of the show was picking on something that (on any other non-FA fat girl) would have been extremely unnerving. She was so careful in the dressing room, telling me how "SERIOUSLY!" beautiful I looked and everything; responding to my comments on size with, "No, but you're so beautiful." I was like, "Really honey, it's okay--I am fat, and I know it, and there's nothing wrong with it. You can be fat and beautiful--not but beautiful. I'm actually super into size acceptance..." etc., telling her about FA and everything.

Anyway, the public really came through for the show. The most prevalent reason that people intervened was that the wedding was the bride's day, and that no one should try to make her feel badly about her life or body or choices. But there was one lady who really was wonderful as far as the body in general...she, too was a Jersey girl (be still my heart!) and this wonderful, incredibly warm woman. She was fat and LOVELY, in her 40s or 50s, and just so motherly. She came to me and was SO body positive, very into being comfortable in your own skin and not trying to be anything else. She had said one thing that I can't remember now that rubbed me the wrong way, but only as a general belief of teh fatz.

Anyway--all worked out pretty well. I can't wait to see it. :)


Saturday, July 26, 2008

ONE OF US! ONE OF US! (heeheeheeheehee)

Through a brilliant and wonderful career counselor that I am starting to work with (the quirky and lovely Erin Cronican with The Actors Enterprise), I am going through her blog's archives to catch up on all her news. I just found this from her October 2007: "Discrimination against plus-size actors."


It links to the glorious Jennifer Jonassen, who blogs at Plus Model Magazine, and this post. This makes me super-duper happy and excited, because she can now be another link in the chain of me, Joy, Marina and COUNTLESS other ridiculously talented fat women who deserve and DEMAND parts that defy the "shameless chowhound" role that we all get stuck in time and time again.

(Note: It might well be said that there are definitely better roles for fat character actresses as we age--and I very-much look forward to playing them when I'm older--but for now? Give me Juliet!!)

Jennifer offers a first post (very similar to my own) HERE, and I too will continue to follow her stuffs. I'm gonna post to her and try to establish a relationship; see how we can sort of be bi-coastal representatives, ya know?

Check her out--I know I will! (Maybe we can even wrangle her into the FOS ;-) )



Oh, come the funk on! If nothing else BLATANTLY says that being fat and healthy is a paradox..! (Or that thinness is equivalent to health.)

Important: I have been nothing but impressed and, frankly, very moved with all the stuff you other Fatosphere bloggers write. Whether or not it's particularly FA all the time, I believe a good portion of you are aspiring or working writers, and that's very exciting to me! I am under the most likely self-imposed belief that I DO NOT creative write and that I'm terrible. I don't think it's actually true, but rather that I've mentally locked myself into "I-haven't-done-that-since-I-was-10" mode.

Where is this going. Right.

Where this is GOING is: I am getting more and more convinced that I need to start either writing my own work or to workshop with others. If any of you are or have ever wanted to write work that was to be performed, I AM SUPER INTERESTED! Think "Fat Rant"-ish, or even something not so much an anthem as an FA-related performance. It could even be about beans! But most importantly, I'd love for my work to come from the soul of a fat woman. Not a thin man or woman or people who idolize those bodies; someone from skin like my own.

AND AND AND: My creativity has been in hyperdrive, and I've thought up some SUPER neat ideas. Which I would love to share with potential participants. :)


Thursday, July 24, 2008

Speaking of 'Walking the Talk'....

...I just found this. Does anyone think it could be a step in our direction? :-/ I too hope this is more empowering than stereotypical.

Thursday, Jul. 24, 2008, 10:55 AM Pacific




Presented in a festival of new short plays by the New Perspectives Theatre Company's
Women's Work lab. Will be presented on a bill with 2 other short plays.


[ ZAN ]
Asian American Female, mid-late 30s, full figured, but not particularly overweight.
Funny, dry
sense of humor.

STORY: Lexy Lee has the sneaking suspicion that she's "large for her breed".
She'll do anything for a major-league makeover. Or will she?




What, I ask you, is cooler than being cast in a PRIMETIME TV ROLE on ABC PRIMETIME NEWS for WHAT WOULD YOU DO?!

I'll tell you what: Being cast as a fat bride being ripped to SHREDS by her mom, and trying to see if people will intervene and put Momzilla in her place.


(Also, I would have accepted 'bunnies.')


Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Anyone Else Feel Creeped Out?!


The Conlin Company & Twins Talent

-Multiple Locations-

Reality TV & Documentary, Competitions, Modeling



Casting Notice Description:
‘THE GREAT AMERICAN BEAUTY’The Conlin Company & Twins Talent (prods.) are casting The Great American Beauty (working title), a new primetime show for ABC Television that will give beautiful people the chance to show America just how beautiful they really are. Lisa Ganz, casting prod. Shooting begins approx. early Sept. in a location TBA.Seeking—Beautiful Males and Females: 18-30, all ethnicities, beautiful and waiting for their big break, people are always complimenting their looks, who know they’re beautiful even if they don’t admit it, turn heads when they walk in the door, have gotten jobs because of their looks, uses beauty to get everything they want, loves to be the center of attention, so hot on the beach that everyone stares, comes from a small town or big city and ready to be noticed, knows they’re hot and wants America to know it, have gotten dates because of their looks, so beautiful it intimidates potential dates, so beautiful it has caused strains in their family, so beautiful that looks have prevented them getting a lucrative job. Note: Married, divorced, or single can apply; you can have children, to be voted the most beautiful person in America.To apply (or to nominate a friend), email ASAP, with subject “American Beauty.” Include your name, contact info, telephone numbers, current pix (full-length and close-up), age, where you live, and a brief description of why you would be right for the show. Meals and travel provided. Winner receives cash prize.



Friday, July 18, 2008


I had written out, like, 5 posts to write while my internet was down--but this supercedes them all!


I have the possibility of being a webhost (a la "Elastic Waistband"...which I was actually up for, FTW) for a women's network. I can choose from an array on topics of what I want to cover. CLEARLY we all know what that might be! Here is the letter to me from the producer:

"Dear Jen,

Thank you for responding to our ad in Backstage for the WebTV hosting positions. We are searching for women who would like an opportunity to host their own shows within a fun new women's site launching in several months. If you’ve got talent, this is a great opportunity to be seen and heard! The shows will be viewed within our site as well as within the sites of several distribution partners we’re considering. They can be between 2-4 minutes in length and produced within any number of areas including: relationships, beauty, fashion, health, fitness, comedy, documentary, entertainment, sex, travel, shopping, sports, college life, jobs, etc. The show content and focus is entirely up to you.

If you have a camera, we'll provide you with a Mini DV tape, or a memory stick and a return envelope to get you started. This allows us to test this concept to see if your ideas fit within our content parameters and if Hosting is really for you. We'll also provide the necessary instructions, forms and releases you'll need to get started and produce your own shows. If you're interested in exploring this further, please pick a date below for us to discuss the role and expectations of our show hosts, the show requirements, website, formats and much more in greater detail. We are happy to support many women in this role and would encourage you to apply.

We are very excited about the launch of this site and believe it will become an extraordinary destination for today's young women. I look forward to hearing from you and exploring your involvement with us. We've attached a PDF file outlining some of the fun entertainment coming your way!"

The question is: WHAT do I prepare? I don't want to get turned away for being radical. Any writings for me? Any ideas? Come and brainstorm!


Monday, July 14, 2008

Strangely-Familiar Characters

Well, I didn't realize I was getting comments, because apparently I didn't set my blog to notify me when they were made. Oops. I thank those of you who have commented, for stopping by, connecting, and wishing me luck on my various projects. :) I am so thrilled to be an active part of the Fatosphere!

As promised, I mentioned that these is always the fat condition of being cast BECAUSE you're fat. It happens everywhere, but we're clearly the ones who are almost always the butt of the jokes or the sad sack.


It is especially difficult to be cast when you are fat, but also vibrant--with a leading lady personality and voice.

What have people decided to do in lieu of this?

Alter their scripts to CHANGE THE ROLE. No, you read me right, and yes, I wish I were kidding. I don't mean this in the positive way, either.

I was in a short film a year ago, playing a lead who was depressed and about to drown herself at sea. The producer and director loved me so much, but--oh!--I'm fat, so let's make it that she's a FAT girl whose boyfriend dumped her because she's such a shameless chowhound, and that's why she goes to drown herself. Oh! But! It gets better! After her epiphany when she's taking herself out to sea, you cut to her personal rehabilitation, and she is....running.

Oooooooooooooof COURSE.

Because CLEARLY a fat chick can't just be depressed period; she must be depressed because people won't love her because she's fat. And to fix herself and make life worth living, she runs and loses weight.


Now, I can't stress enough to you the HILARITY of this situation--I was irritated and annoyed that they would do this, but the director and producer LOVE me. Adore me. Do not think ill of me in any way....except that I'm fat, and they therefore needed to justify my presence on-screen.

Not only did this happen in one film, but within a few months I was involved in yet ANOTHER film which took similar steps. I was auditioning for the role of a 15-year-old girl who had been molested and was now going through major shock. I had a rock-solid audition, and the director and producer loved me. They wanted someone with darker features, but they had a role for me, they said! I got the script, and in the middle of the story, I see my name as the character's name. Uh....what? At the time, I was also in a production of Richard III, and I'm reading...and the character says, "Hey, come see me in Richard III!"

Aha, you have MORPHED me into your screenplay. Clever.

(But ohdoesit get better.)

My me-character is trying to help a transvestite stop wrestling with himself and find peace. I thought it was just going to be this empowering conversation, but I'm reading, and I SWEAR TO GOD....


I admire you.





You look very happy and confident.

Being with you, makes me relaxed and comfortable.

You have magic!

How can you be so happy?


I learned.

Look at me.

I know my body…and I know the first impression people get from me.

Is the appearance so important?

Yes…I agree…appearance is the life of some actors.

But it doesn’t mean my dream has to be stopped due to my weight.

Acting is my dream; eating is my pleasure.

I enjoy being myself, and living the way I want.


Do you mind when people judge you?


I don’t care how people look at me before they know me,

but I do care how people value me after they know me.

Accept it or not, it is impossible for everyone to love me.

What I did, and I am doing right now is balance the fine line

between myself and the rest of the world.

You know one of the reasons I like acting…it’s because I can become someone else for a while, thinking differently, moving differently, feeling differently.

I convert myself into the roles with my soul, my passion, and my professionalism.

That’s the way I convince people beyond my appearance.

Besides, I know I have a good personality that makes people like me.

How much ridiculousness can possibly be fit into 2 minutes of text?! Now we know. Thankfully, no one else has tried to work my weight in as a freaking plot point--yet. But I needed to share these with you. At least this second one, as laughable and irritating as it is, still portrays me as someone confident, secure and pleased with herself--and being ALLOWED to be so.

I had a brain child some time ago about starting a theatre company that's expressly for fat actors (how do I weed out thinner people who think they're fat? Prerequisite: You must write on your audition form the most painful instance of others discriminating against you based on being a fat person). It would be an outlet for fatties to play leading roles, letting the general public FINALLY view us as people worthy of wooing, excitement, romance, bravery, tenderness,'s still on my pile. I sure as hell don't have the production monies, but if any of you other NYers out there have the dime and the time, send me a line. :)


Sunday, July 13, 2008

Being the Butt of the Joke (Or Not?)

This week, I'm filming an episode of a show that used to be/is again the twinner of Sesame Street--"The Electric Company." They were a more adult S.S., and taught principles of grammar and reading. They were popular in the early '70s and are now resurfacing. I'm very excited--this is my first TV bit--but I'm wondering about the implications.

If we imagine that there are 2 types of young, Caucasion fat gal: (1) being super outgoing and funny and the goofy gal who works it (i.e.: Tracy Turnblad) and (2) being the very cloistered, sheltered, outcast, self-hating fat gal, I am--both character-wise and in real life--very much the first choice. I'm too bubbly and happy, physically and personally, to be the latter. However, if I'm ever able to fool producers and casting directors, I could be cast as the second. That's what had happened in last month's movie auditions, and that's what's happening now, I believe.

I was cast in "The Electric Company" to be part of a group of nerds. They were specifically looking for Trekkie-types (which I am not), but I thought, hey! Maybe I can squeeze in if I play on my body shape! Lo and behold, they can envision the fat girl as a loner and 'square' and all that, and so of course I can be in the nerdy group.

I am very much looking forward to filming this week, but I constantly worry about spitting in the face of FA with my job. I am an actor; for the time being, I need to make my money being what society thinks fat people are. It's a damn shame, and we've seen it happen to all the fat actors out there--even worse when they get ridonk-skinny and change their tune. I do work with companies and people who challenge social stereotypes and think I'm marvelous, but they're still not as aware of the stereotypes and stimuli placed on fat people and how it hurts our cause.

I've worked with this in several projects, wrestled it; I have a post comin' real soon about some previous roles...

The good news? There are absolutely companies and people and artists of all sizes out there who think the way we do (or at least crudely), and who are willing to have a fat girl be a love interest or healthy know, any number of things that we're not otherwise allowed to be. The hard part is being able to make a living off them for the time being.

In my mind's eye, if I see large enough success, I see myself drawing attention to FA and the entire Fatosphere, trumpeting our purpose out over the airwaves and internet. Who knows?...

Maybe I should contact Joy about being co-spokesladies down the line. ;-)


Tuesday, June 17, 2008

And a Noble Try it is!

My partner is also a fat actor. He is the most delightful man on the planet and I could not be more proud to have such a mensch by my side. He has written several monologues about being a fat woman under the guise of me, and, bless his heart...he has penned yet another:

"Callin' All Fat Bitches,

Now I know the last two words are taboo in society but I'm here to fight for these words and the true representation of their meaning. I am Fat there is nothing wrong with me I am content the mere reasoning that someone else has a problem with who I am is Nazism. And they can go fuck themselves obviously they aren't content enough with themselves and feel the need to extend their self hatred to others. My only other suggestion to them besides the afore mentioned is to open their veins and take a warm bath. Now for the second word, Bitches, this an interesting word for any of you etymologists out there because it has been used by a variety of different people mainly to denigrate those of my gender merely, there I go using that word again, because we women have stood up for something that wasn't popular. Well now I'm calling you all to stand up and use the title with pride because you are fighting for something that questions those in charge. Stand up and be noticed trumpet our cause from every mountain top. If they want to label us then let that label be our fight song for soon they will realize we are great in number and not just in size and we will be herd!

In Omnibus Corpulent,

Your Fat Bitch Queen"

He's learning! :-D And quite possibly deserves a Baby-favored Donut Tee-shirt.


Monday, June 16, 2008

This Chowhound got a Callback!

I don't believe I informed y'all, but that big movie I auditioned for? I was asked for a callback. I found that out last week amid much squee-age, and I felt great because the audition went REALLY well--sometimes an audition feels excellent and there's no dice, and sometimes you wonder HOW you pulled something off. It's just wacky like that. Anyway, this time, we were synched! Awesome!

I just had my callback today, for that role of the 16-year old shameful fatty. As I was not only meeting with one casting director but *2*, AND with the actual director of the film, I wanted to center myself and sorta get in the zone. I used my excess time beforehand in a health food smoothie place that made me feel a slight visceral twinge of self-awareness, since everyone in there equated their health nut zealousness with the absence of fat. But I was still 'neath my cloak of "Fuck It."

What can I do? Surely I can't browse Shapely Prose--that will only make me feel more at peace with myself. I decided to give myself a large helping of Sanity Watchers points and googled "Fat + disgusting + gross." I got a bunch of sites telling us how ugly we are and what a blight we are on society...and I was trying so hard to get upset and shameful about it, but I just couldn't. I have so *positively* brainwashed myself that even Maddox cannot make me feel unattractive!

As I'm an actor anyway, it really didn't matter how *I* was feeling. I translated the problems of fatties everywhere (and problems I had only until a year or so ago, if that) onto poor Chowhound. The casting team responded REALLY well. And now, we let this go. If it happens, it happens--if it doesn't, I still made a damn good impression as the fantastic fat girl.


Thursday, June 12, 2008

There is No Spoon! (But there might be a sundae)

I feel like educating women about the reality of sizeism and beauty is like the matrix.

We have all been brought up so WARPED regarding what is and what is not beautiful in this world. For someone who then conforms to it to hear it ripped apart? Not so easy. I think it might even be easier for us fatties, because we're essentially brought up being told that we WEREN'T beautiful.

A little backtracking: I went through high school wearing some make-up. Probably not as much as other girls, but I did make sure to wear mascara every day, because I'm blond--and when it's not on, I don't have eyelashes. For a while, I thought it was just great to put mascara on...until I had to remove it at night. I remember looking at my face in the mirror and thinking, "Oh my God, where did my eyes go? I look so terrible!" That little nagging voice got progressively louder through the 4 years, and I became very uncomfortable putting make-up on in the first place. I dreaded how I'd feel after the high of feeling glamorous and sexy.

So, when I started college, I just gave it up. I've been blessed with a pretty good complexion, so make-up wasn't about neutralizing for me--it was about enhancing. And I stopped! Without much of an issue.

My roommate and close friend is. A. KNOCKOUT. She is the one that passes hordes of men and they ALL turn to stare. She is exotic, beautiful, confident, and a complete and utter mensch. I love her with every cell in my body. That first year of college, I realized that she spent at least an hour every day getting ready by doing her hair and putting on makeup.

"Andrea," I said, "What in the world are you doing that for? You look incredible!"

Of course, cue her eye rolls and countless criticisms to herself in the mirror. This woman TRULY does not see herself fit to leave the house unless she's painted. No joke. (And she looks better without.)

"But Dre!" I say, "Don't you understand that you're just told that you need makeup to look pretty as a convention created to subjugate women in this horrendous society that treats us as though we're just playtoys to sit and look pretty and impress and pick up men you look fabulous completely naturally shirk off the cloak of chauvinism and declare your womanhood!"

*cue glassy stare*

She was kinda speechless for a moment, and I could have SWORN that something reached her, but the next minute she was fighting me to get back to her well-lit mirror.

My second attempt to indoctrinate someone into our ways...I feel a little better about. :)

I'm working with an adorable, adorable lady who plays opposite me in the show I'm currently working on. She is tiny and spastic, like a chipmunk, and she is sweet as pie. She mentioned sullenly to the cast the other night that she "used to be a size 14" (and I'm sure, fatties, we can all imagine the tone in her voice). Oh, if my filters had been off! Sadly, it was neither the time nor the place, and I squeezed by with what sounded like a growling cat.

Last night, little Katherine comes up to me in costume (we're in sexy pirate dresses, and we are ALL knockouts, FTW) and she says, "Does this make me look....ah.....bigger? Wider?" (I have a feeling she was dancing around it because I'm the only fatty in the cast, holding at about a 16/18)
As the words of Kate and The Rotund and Joy were about to shriek forth from my lungs, something said HOLD IT! This is your chance to not overwhelm her and maybe lead her in!

So I said, "No, Katherine, you don't look bigger. You do look fantastic."
She replied, "I just feel like...I don't know. I've put on a lot of weight recently. I just don't understand it."

Choosing my words carefully, I tested the waters.
"Well...I think you look great. And if your body's putting on weight, there's probably a very good reason for it. Our bodies are smarter than we realize, ya know?"

"Yeah," she said, "You're right."

Wait, someone acknowledged that?! That there might be a GOOD reason to gain weight?!?!? EUREKA!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was thrilled with her openness and non fat-hatred, and continued, saying, "You know, just treat your body respectfully and don't worry about it. You look wonderful, and there's no reason to change anything about what you're doing."

She looked genuinely pleased, and I was THRILLED. I long to, day after day, accost people and say SHATTER YOUR PERCEPTIONS! But I know they're not ready for that. There is no spoon, know what I mean? What have your experiences been opening friends to the epiphany that is FA & HAES?

By the way, I first began my metamorphosis towards FA after a 4-month-long crash diet. It was called "EAT TO LIVE," and I know there are already some people who have done this one. It's basically a raw foods diet, with just fruit and veg. In that vein, it was really excellent--but being deprived of everything else was restricting and depressing--for real. After 2 months and my boyfriend having said that I wasn't the same, I googled veganism + depression. Lo and behold, hit after hit surfaced linking the two due to low animal-derived B vitamins. I gradually worked animal foods back into my diet.

Amazingly, I'd only lost 20 pounds after ***4 months*** of eating like a bunny, essentially. I was confused and upset and cranky. After getting off the diet for my mental health, the weight came back (and then some), and fast. I began to feel like, if THAT couldn't even change my body, then it was becoming pretty friggin' clear that I was MEANT TO BE FAT. I had been since childhood, I was even when eating kale and doing high-octane, hour-long workouts per day, and I still was when I wasn't doing all that.

I mulled that idea over for a couple years, and it made me a bit more comfy in my own skin. I found this haven of a community in December, maybe, after having seen Ms. Nash's "Fat Rant" on YouTube and pointing and screaming, "YES! Other people actually feel this way?!" Visiting her site took me to the Fatosphere, and, well, you know.

Anyway, that's my story, and I'm stickin' to it. ;)


Saturday, June 7, 2008

Black or White, and its part in Showbiz

Yesterday there was a very moving piece at Jiggly Bits, and Chrissy shared with the FA community her fears of being alone as a fat woman. LOADS of people reached out to her to empathize and strengthen her, promising that there is someone somewhere! Many of us have found him or her after a very long time of looking and being alone. The best part is--it comes when you least expect it, and have your mind on it the least. Which brings us to the first goal--of loving yourself and your life enough to enjoy it tremendously, even without a mate.

At any rate! Chrissy's heard all that. There was a lady who posted named Mari, who is a dark black woman. She commented that most FA ladies are white (which seems to be true), and also commented on how much MORE difficult it is to be fat and black, especially when it seems that even black men would prefer fat white women to them.

In reality: Mari is ab-so-lute-ly RIGHT. And as a white fat woman, I don't have the experience of having yet a third stigma (race) against me in this world. I can't pretend to know, either--but I can commit to being there for the racial diversity that's shown in this movement, and for seeing beyond color to give them as much of an even keel as is possible. Colors aside, we fatties are here for each other and supportive no matter what.

What this brings me to (oy, I'm really all over the place!), is the REALITY vs. ENTERTAINMENT. I had commented back to Mari that there is some discrepancy between how she lives the status of a black fat woman and how they are portrayed (vs. fat white women) in movies, TV, etc.

Most fat black women in entertainment display one or many of the following qualities: strength, maternal power, 'sassiness,' attitude, support, a hefty diet of soul food and home cooking,intimidation, street-smarts, funkiness, female empowerment, 'fabulousness.' This includes your run-of-the-mill fat black women and your two staples, Mo'Nique and Queen Latifah.

In my opinion (as a white person), this is a direct contrast to fat white woman (and not just pleasantly plump like Mrs. Weasley, I mean fatter): these women are almost always portrayed as ugly, unwanted, with little to no self-confidence, eternally dieting OR gorging on junk, not having any romantic prospects, being slow or lazy, and being in the way of society as opposed to part of it. There are maybe 2 exceptions to these- Camryn Manheim and Kathy Bates (and she spent the first half of "Fried Green Tomatos" being that exact description).

So what's the problem? It perpetrates major stereotypes, on both ends. Mari had mentioned the main fat black woman in entertainment to be like an Aunt Jemima or Mammy. I was thinking, "No! Of course not, that's----ohmygod, she's right." The only difference is that today's fat black women on the small and silver screens aren't subservient to white people. In fact, you had better fucking watch your back, or they'll take you down right here right now! Is that any better of a stereotype?! No! Who wants to be with a woman like this? Who wants to work with a woman who caustically grunts, "Mmmmmm HMM," as customers pass by?

While it may, at first, seem like fat black women in roles have it easier than fat white women, the self-assured profile is a double-edged sword: it STILL portrays these women as unpleasant to be around, pains in the ass, abusive or nasty to husbands, rough with their kids, smothering, etc.

The New York Times did an article nearly two years ago that I just found, that's just absolutely prolific on the matter: An Image Popular in Films Raises some Eyebrows in Ads.

As a semi-inside source, I can sadly say that it's not changing anytime soon. Each casting that I see for heavy/heavyset/overweight/voluptuous/etc. African-American women asks for (essentially) someone fat, sassy, with a lot of attitude and who doesn't take nothing from nobody.
And, yes, the same goes for the white folk--as you can see, that description has still not changed, re: the character I auditioned for the other day.

What are your views and experiences with these caricatures of our people?


Tuesday, June 3, 2008

'Shameless Chowhound'

Like the Shameless Chowhound that I am...I rocked today!

I've been temping for a while, so I giddily flew out of the office at 10:30 this morning, positively BEAMING, having spent far too much time deciding what I should wear for this. Thus is the problem of looking 15--how do I dress like a 15-year-old while still showing professionalism?

The casting director was made of sunshine. No joke. She was so incredibly sweet, patient, and gave direction--which is always a big 'plus' in the actor's book. She was also notably fat-friendly, which I was very pleased with! She was discussing the character and the other BBW in the script, and how they're appreciated for their beautiful curves. Hmm, I thought. This is going far too well.

Luckily, that's where it ended! There was no 'oh crap' moment. She had me read ALL the scenes, several times, gave me lots of direction, looked really happy when I'd nailed it, and asked me lots of questions. If it wouldn't be too stalker-y of me, I'd send her a flippin' fruit basket.

As a predominantly theatre actor, if I get this will be a ridiculously amazing leap for me.



Monday, June 2, 2008

The Big Question

I am at somewhat of a crossroads.

I freelance with an agent that just got me a huuuuge audition for tomorrow.

It's a feature film starring Andy Garcia, and there's a role in there for a 'chubby teenager' who's down on herself. Her parents put her on terrible diets, and she's miserable. When she's pursued by a character who I assume is a 'chubby chaser,' he brings her out of her shell and she actually begins to feel beautiful just the way she is.

Great, right? The message is excellent and pretty in-line with FA measures.

Here's the bad part--

I have a feeling it's not totally executed the right way. What really turned me off was the casting breakdown, which describes the character's metamorphosis as such:

"Invited over to Denise's house to eat like the shameless chowhound she really is, Cheryl soon
finds herself a regular visitor to Denise's groaning kitchen table...1 speech & 12 lines, 6 scenes (7)"

Um...WHAT? Did you seriously just call a fat chick a SHAMELESS CHOWHOUND?

Boy howdy, I am *really* hoping that's just their "sense of humor," because someone's asking for it with that shit.

Also, not really FA and HAES--Cheryl is on a diet of, like, lentils and okra, and she is asked by this boy to come eat pizza and doughnuts (baby-flavored, no doubt) and all sorts of 'junk food'. Why do they assume she'd WANT to eat only 'unhealthy' foods? Oh, yes, because she's fat.

And so here, we have our discrepancy. I sincerely doubt I'd be mistreated or disrespected as an actor, but it really boils my blood to see how they would insult a character in a freakin' BREAKDOWN, for chrissakes.

In the best of worlds, WHEN I get this role and become unionized and have my Hollywood debut, I can always crow the good side of the writing--that the text blatantly calls Cheryl beautiful, without trying to change who she is. People love her anyway, and she now loves herself. I can just add on all my extra proselytizing of HAES.

We'll see how this all goes--that's my next hurdle...


FA can has Backstabbrz?

So, a full report on the previously mentioned MTV SHOW: 'MODEL MAKER.'

MTV 'MODEL MAKER' | MTV | -Multiple Locations- | Reality TV & Documentary
Details | Locations | Contact
Casting Notice Description:

MTV is casting Model Maker, a new boot camp-style reality show for girls who dream about being a model but whose weight stops them from reaching their dream. Shooting approx. three months (dates TBA).

Seeking—Female Contestants: 18-25, 5'6"+, willing to shed 30 to 100 pounds to become a healthy, self-confident, high profile fashion model, with great attitude, pretty face, and the endurance to sweat off the weight.

Auditions will be held May 17, 2-5 p.m. at Torrid Store, Palisades Center, 1000 Palisades Center Dr ., W. Nyack, NY and May 18, 2-5 p.m. at Torrid Store, Cherry Hill Mall, 2000 Rte. 38, Cherry Hill, NJ. To submit online, email; include your name, age, contact info, height and weight, and a brief bio about yourself and why you want to be a model. Attach a current photo, and include your audition state in the subject of your email. For more info and to view audition info in other cities, visit Winner receives $100,000 and a possible modeling contract.

Where shall we begin with how offensive this is?! Oh, right, I know--how about with the fact that Torrid is hosting the bloody thing?

Immediately after receiving this in my breakdowns, I sent an e-mail with this text the Shapely Prose team, as well as Paul at BigFatBlog, letting them know what horrors had come about. I also sent a rather scathing letter to the figureheads at Torrid:


I cannot for the life of me imagine why you are sponsoring the new MTV 'show' "Model Maker." As a very forward-thinking business that has encouraged women and girls of size to be happy with their bodies and be able to feel beautiful and sexy (even in this incredibly fat-hatred society), that you would then FUND new American tripe that says, "Sure you'll be pretty, once you're 30-100lbs thinner," is DISGUSTING.

Are you aware that the psychological pressures put on young women through media, society and their peers, all telling them YOUR BODY IS NOT OKAY are ridiculously more harmful to anyone's health than cellulite or a fat belly?

This hatred, fueled by people who have claimed that it would be okay to even put fat people in modern day concentration camps (, is so incredibly destructive to women that it turns them from troubled children with body image trauma to WOMEN with body image trauma, and guess who they then pass their baggage onto? That's right--their daughters, who don't yet know how horrendously prejudiced and patriarchal this society is.

Fat people are told they are not allowed to exist EVERY DAY, in very blatant ways. In every ad that neglects to show a woman with a little meat on her bones, in every diet program that exists, in the glares that people give you for daring to share this earth with them, and most CERTAINLY in this fucking excuse for a television show, "Model Maker."

YOU ARE *TORRID.* Does that mean nothing to you? You are one of the only VISIBLE companies that has been proud to serve the fat-female community, especially with non-matronly clothing.

And this is certainly not about health. Size is not an indicator of health, much as pharmaceutical companies would have you believe otherwise. Health does not equal thin, and fat does not equal unhealthy. (

I am appalled at this promotional move of your company, and I have already begun to inform the figureheads of the Fat Acceptance movement about this backstabbing role you've taken as a company. I implore you, if you have any decency, to please involve yourselves in something much more body positive--like Lifetime's "How To Look Good Naked."


I was smoothly replied-to with this:

Hi Jen,

Thanks for your email. I'm sorry that you feel we have let you down. We did think this over for a long time before agreeing to let MTV cast their show at Torrid locations. Just to be clear, we are not a sponsor of the show. We are not supporting the show financially in any way, either. MTV came to us because they believe that we have many beautiful plus size customers in our stores and they are right.

For the first 3 months of the year we featured The Glamazons in all of our windows and in national ads in 17 and Glamour magazines. Not one of them is smaller than a size 18 and we loved showing the world how great confident women with real curves can look. In our windows now are photographs of our 2007 Model Search Winners....all young girls with curvy bodies and big smiles. We have consistently promoted healthy body image through our association with American Idol winner Jordin Sparks, High School Musical's Kaycee Stroh, and plus size supermodel Joanne Borgella. We will soon be featuring model turned author Mia Tyler, a very full size 16, who is releasing a new book called Finding Myself which chronicles her path to self acceptance. Likewise we will be hosting noted blogger Stephanie Klein in our stores for book signings of her new book, Moose, A Memoir of Fat Camp during June and July. Later in the summer we will once again launch our now famous Torrid Model Search. All of our customers are not the same and we work very hard to serve up a broad spectrum of fashion and special events throughout the year.

I appreciate your insights into how society treats plus sized women. We live it every day in every Torrid store. I get email every single day from customers thanking Torrid for giving them the chance to feel good about themselves. I have an adolescent daughter and I totally understand what you are saying. We get it and we do more than any other retail company in the world to advocate for plus size customers. As much as I appreciate your passion because we share it, I might suggest that you focus some of that energy on cosmetic companies, car companies, the food industry, the entertainment industry, and other companies that spend zillions on advertising and rarely use a model larger than a size 6, as if bigger women don't have real lives.

Of all the emails we get from customers the number one inquiry by far (other than requests for more Torrid locations) is from young women who want to know how to become a model for Torrid. Each summer we have over 3000 of our own customers show up for our model search. Likewise the MTV "Made" episode featuring a young woman from Ohio who had a dream of becoming a plus model for Torrid had incredible response from our customers and in fact introduced many new customers to the world of Torrid. Clearly the world of modeling is of great interest to many Torrid customers.

We support all of our customers whether you are happy as you are or dream about making changes in your life. I stand 100% behind our customer service and how we welcome guests to our store feel every single day. Our core philosophy is, and remains, that any size can be beautiful. Model Maker is a show about health, fitness, and beauty....all of which are important to a lot of our customers. There is nothing unhealthy about eating better and working out. The show is not about starving the contestants down to a size 2. I am very sorry that you are offended and I hope you will still feel comfortable shopping with us. We stand behind you and your dreams, too!

Have a nice weekend,

Chris Daniel

President, Torrid

Though I didn't realize at first--and FJ and I were both impressed that the president would respond--a little digging taught me that this was a mass e-mail, sent to all the righteous fatties who had serious issues with Torrid's support on this mess.

Though Mr. Daniel says that they're not financially supporting Model Maker in any way, they kind of are, aren't they? They're the ones providing MTV with little lambs off to the slaughter, tubby teenagers just dying to shed some pounds to be 'real models.' Dear lord, what is with these people?! Of COURSE all you receive are letters of girls who want to model--that is what this ridiculous society tells girls they should do. Look pretty and pose and not smile and cock their hips. Most Torrid customers are on the younger side, and most young girls have dreamt of modeling. I bet these girls will also get over it like yesterday's breakfast, and realize that modeling is for a very, very small number of people.

Secondly, his little blurb about concentrating on other industries? No. Because, if you represent fat people and you STILL oppress them, how will mainstream industries ever take us seriously? YOU set the standard to how the fat demographic is treated. On top of this, you are officially now representing the entertainment industry--you have models, you have print ads, and you now are affiliated with MTV and their joke of a reality show.

Has anyone attended or seen this? I made myself very unavailable to the malls that day--I don't have enough Aleve to get me through that crap!


Fat Acting in a Thin World

First Post! This is the one everyone sweats over, since it's your first impression on the community. I'm a total over-analyzing worrier, so I'll just lay it all out for ya.

I've been a lurking member of the Fat Acceptance community (The Fatosphere) for quite some time now. I've gone by different names and posted a few times, always reading, never contributing, always wondering--well, what on earth could I contribute that would be worthwhile? After the fat-bulous Joy Nash (also an actress) utilized YouTube for her legendary "Fat Rant," what would be my step? Joy has used "Fat Rant" as not only an entryway for her talent, but also for her socio-political message. What if, I thought, I used my career as not only monitor for fat issues in the entertainment industry, but (hopefully) as a beacon someday to be a voice for FA in the public eye?

After seeing red when I discovered that MTV was creating a 'modelizing' show for fat girls (which centered on weight loss--"anywhere from 30-100 lbs.!"), it became pretty clear what I needed to do.

I'm proud to be a newly productive member of FA, and I hope this not only keeps the Fatosphere abreast of fat news in entertainment, but also gives a much needed support to fat actors and actresses everywhere.